Lost In The Shuffle

They could both barely hide their disappointment upon seeing one another for the first time. She had never seen him before and her disappointment is immediate, clearly seen in the eyes and in the expression on her face. He had one tactical advantage. He had seen her before, via a photo on the internet, although there’s just a minor discrepancy. The woman standing before him is at least twenty years older than she is in the photograph.

Though both disappointed, they decide to make the best of it and take in Central Park, a day at the Met, and lunch in Chinatown. It’s a rather pleasant afternoon.

Later, over coffee, he can’t help notice how deeply disappointed she is. She wanted to him to be what she imagined him to be, the man he was in their voluminous emails before they met, and he, to be fair, did the same, but instead of focusing on the fact they were actually enjoying one another’s company, grateful there was a potential new friend in one another’s midsts, the conversation keeps veering off toward talk of other men she’d been talking to, one in particular she was rather interested in. He doesn’t mind but does find it amusing. He takes the hint but there’s no reason for her to give him one. He’s just as disappointed, and knows as much as she that this relationship will die on the vine.

It’s funny how lonely people interact with one another, he muses. What’s truly important gets lost in the shuffle, amidst subtle hints and signals, so much so that a friendship isn’t even on the agenda.

Meanwhile they each slip back into the realm of fantasy, coddling their disappointment, until the next one.

New York City, June 2004